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Yngwie Malmsteen, malicious singer firer
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PostPosted: Mon Mar 15, 2004 7:59 pm    Post subject: Yngwie Malmsteen, malicious singer firer Reply with quote

In terms of raw musicianship, in 1985 the greatest rock band in the world was Yngwie Malmsteen's Rising Force. Ignore the record-label co-opted guitar magazines, folks. Nobody touches Malmsteen at peak form. He had one of the all-time great metal vocalists in Jeff Scott Soto, and the very talented Johanssen Brothers, Anders and Jens, Sweden's greatest drummer/keyboard combination ever, backing him up. Their first full-blown metal record, "Marching Out," is on my list of the all-time great metal records. "Icarus's Dream," from Yngwie's mostly instrumental debut, "Rising Force," is the best guitar instrumental I have ever heard.

QUESTION: So what happened? ANSWER: Yngwie and his management company got greedy, and turned the greatest band on the planet into a hair metal disgrace. Go listen to "Facing the Animal," and the insipid and insulting song about Yngwie being a "Prisoner of Your Love." Disgusting.

As if that wasn't bad enough, Yngwie Malmsteen has an unusual way to make himself feel better when his records don't sell in America. Whenever, under whatever collective stupidity it labors, the American record-buying public doesn't buy terribly many copies of an Yngwie record, Yngwie fires the singer! It is the singer's fault, after all, when a record doesn't sell, of course! We blame the dog when Grandma farts! Taken from his own personal website, this is a list of the singers who, one way or another, Yngwie Malmsteen has terminated his musical relationship with:

- Ron Keel: Steeler, 1983

- Graham Bonnet: No Parole, 1983; Live Sentence, 1984

- Jeff Scott Soto: Rising Force, 1984; Marching Out, 1985; Inspiration, 1996

- Mark Boals: Trilogy, 1986; Inspiration, 1996; Alchemy, 1999, War to End All Wars, 2000

- Joe Lynn Turner: Odyssey, 1988; Trial by Fire, 1989; Inspiration, 1996

- Goran Edman: Eclipse, 1990; Fire & Ice, 1992

- Michael Vescera: The Seventh Sign, 1994; I Can't Wait, 1994; Power and Glory, 1994; Magnum Opus, 1995

- Mats Leven: Facing the Animal, 1997; LIVE!!, 1998

- Dougie White: who cares as he is the worst since Ron Keel.

Those poor F*ckers! There really is a difference between Mats Leven and Goran Edman. As If! Here is another quote from that same insipid website, concerning Boals being fired for the third time: "We didn't come to an agreement and I decided to terminate," says the guitarist, who feels that "the singer in my band is another instrument, no more." Notice that it wasn't the music that mattered. It was the "agreement."

There was no excuse for Yngwie's sellout. I would think that Yngwie got paid seven figures just to sign his solo record deal. He was huge immediately in Europe and Japan, and respected in the U.S. The band toured the world. I saw them open for AC/DC, a spot which hundreds of other bands would have eaten their own pinky toes to get. A couple of years later, Soto was out, replaced by the long-suffering and more MTV-friendly (but still very good) Poor Mark Boals. The "Trilogy" record didn't sell in the U.S. Boals got fired for the first time. Continuing in his tradition of working with singers who have been fired by fellow sadistic singer-firer Ritchie Blackmore, Yngwie hired the excellent but fading Joe Lynn Turner, who…

Of all of Yngwie's singer boy toys, the labors of Poor Mark Boals merit special attention. It's not bad enough that the Johanssen brothers used to sing that Poor Mark "Might as well face it, you're a dick with a rug" to the tune of Robert Palmer's "Addicted to Love." Poor Mark Boals holds the record of being fired out of the same band three times, in three different decades! That's right -- Yngwie Malmsteen has fired Poor Mark Boals THREE TIMES IN THREE DIFFERENT DECADES! Incredible! If the guy is so terrible, WHY HAS YNGWIE HIRED HIM THREE TIMES IN THE FIRST PLACE????

"Son of a bitch -- my record didn't sell -- YOU ARE OUTA HERE!"

YNGWIE, YOU ARE SLIME. And, if you want to know why your records don't sell these days, it is probably because THEY SUCK! AND YOU WROTE THE STUFF! IT IS YOUR FAULT! BLINDED BY YOUR RIDICULOUS LUST TO BRING BACK HAIR METAL, YOU ARE WRECKING OTHER MUSICIANS'' CAREERS!

I find it hilarious that Yngwie Malmsteen and Ronnie Dio recently hooked up to cover Aerosmith's "Dream On." Neither has written a song even remotely near that caliber for years. The thing about those sessions that is amazing is that they managed to finish the song without either one of them trying to fire the other one!
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JosephC



Joined: 26 Apr 2000
Posts: 1074
Location: Middleton, WI

PostPosted: Mon Mar 15, 2004 8:12 pm    Post subject: Yngwie Malmsteen, malicious singer firer Reply with quote

Are you Bralalalala? Fu*k, I can't believe I responded in the Iced Earth thread. There is 10 minutes of my life I will never have back.
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PaulEMoz



Joined: 24 Oct 2000
Posts: 843
Location: Newcastle, England...now in Detroit, MI, USA

PostPosted: Mon Mar 15, 2004 8:22 pm    Post subject: Yngwie Malmsteen, malicious singer firer Reply with quote

"Prisoner of Your Love" was on "The Seventh Sign", four years earlier, not "Facing The Animal".

Vocally, all of his singers ARE different. He fires them for whatever reason, like any 'project leader' fires people. If Mark Boals wants to be re-hired, then he obviously doesn't have many problems with Yngwie's aggressive style or he wouldn't have worked with him again.
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Wyvern



Joined: 03 May 2002
Posts: 2214
Location: Costa Rica

PostPosted: Mon Mar 15, 2004 9:25 pm    Post subject: Yngwie Malmsteen, malicious singer firer Reply with quote

When I read the Vai one I thought it was PDp, but now it looks like the siamese twin of Brouhaha. Hey Dillinger, do you have a split personality? [img]images/smiles/icon_biggrin.gif[/img]
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EnRaged



Joined: 09 Jan 2003
Posts: 90
Location: New Orleans, LA

PostPosted: Tue Mar 16, 2004 5:48 pm    Post subject: Yngwie Malmsteen, malicious singer firer Reply with quote

Whether I agree or disagree with his opinions, COW makes for some interesting reading. Don't crack on him too hard, or he might leave, and then I'LL have to start new topics. And my topics suck... [img]images/smiles/icon_biggrin.gif[/img]
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iwarrior



Joined: 05 Apr 2002
Posts: 3526
Location: Pittsburgh,PA

PostPosted: Tue Mar 16, 2004 7:53 pm    Post subject: Yngwie Malmsteen, malicious singer firer Reply with quote

quote:
Dougie White: who cares as he is the worst since Ron Keel.
I thought his performance on Attack! was his best yet,and I wasn't his biggest fan before that since I found his singing bland. He actually had some bite to his vox this time, sounding like a cross between Biff Byford and Blaze Bayley. In fact,I think he was the highlight of Attack!,which may have been why Malmsteen fired him and his other singers. Malmsteen doesn't like anyone stealing his thunder. It could also be that he's too much of a jerk to work with. He's never had a bad singer imo though.
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PaulEMoz



Joined: 24 Oct 2000
Posts: 843
Location: Newcastle, England...now in Detroit, MI, USA

PostPosted: Tue Mar 16, 2004 9:55 pm    Post subject: Yngwie Malmsteen, malicious singer firer Reply with quote

quote:
Originally posted by iwarrior:
quote:
Dougie White: who cares as he is the worst since Ron Keel.
In fact,I think he was the highlight of Attack!,which may have been why Malmsteen fired him and his other singers.
Fired him? Dougie White? No, he's currently touring America with him. Unless I read you wrong....
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iwarrior



Joined: 05 Apr 2002
Posts: 3526
Location: Pittsburgh,PA

PostPosted: Wed Mar 17, 2004 5:50 pm    Post subject: Yngwie Malmsteen, malicious singer firer Reply with quote

Sorry,I thought he fired Doogie too from the initial post. [img]images/smiles/icon_biggrin.gif[/img]
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PostPosted: Wed Mar 17, 2004 5:55 pm    Post subject: Yngwie Malmsteen, malicious singer firer Reply with quote

Dougie is still around, but I figure before too much time has passed, he will be toast too, and I wouldn't want to confuse people who read this after that.
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